when same-party politicians bicker, we all win

Here is something you should start following, and trust me when I say that it has potential to be not only hilarious, but also have very interesting repercussions for the state of California. No, I’m not referencing earthquakes, Gary Coleman, Paris Hilton, a new guy claiming the have proof that he is the father of Anna Nicole’s baby, rolling blackouts, Ari Gold, or even the Oakland Raiders. I’m speaking, of course, about Rush Limbaugh and Arnold Schwarzenegger trading insults via the California media.

Rush Limbaugh likes to call himself “The Most Dangerous Man in America” because of his political power in swaying voters opinions nationwide. Besides the fact that this is a name only the most arrogant bastard in the world would self-apply, I also do not agree with his conclusion. Right now I’m still convinced the Zodiac Killer is the most dangerous man in America, but you’re welcome to your own fears, be they rational or irrational. Regardless, as you probably know, Rush likes to go after left-wing extremists and call them names. At this point, I think the only people who listen to Rush Limbaugh are people who either actually agree with him or are just looking for a laugh, so he isn’t swaying a lot of on the fence voters. I could be terribly wrong, that is just my impression at the moment. But this time Rush is going after one of his own.

It’s no secret that the Govenator is not going to win any right-wing extremist awards, he’s a “progressive republican” at heart. This entry is not making any sort of normative judgments about whether or not he is the right man for the Governorship of California or whether it’s better off. I simply don’t care. The only time I think of California is when I’m eating at CPK, when the EAGLES are beating the 49ers or Raiders, or some other Philly sports team is asserting their West Coast dominance (I usually wake up shortly after this).

The point is, Rush called Arnold a “Closet Liberal”

Arnold responded by calling Rush “irrelevant”, for the entire banter read the article here:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/POLITICS/03/20/arnold.rush/index.html

Two have been sparring and calling each other names back and forth since then. I’m hoping, praying, and crossing fingers, toes, and hair follicles that escalation ensues. So far it’s been pretty moderate.

“Arnold lacks leadership skills.”

“I serve California, not Rush Limbaugh”

etc etc etc

But tell me you shouldn’t love to see this interaction take place:

“Stop being a girly-man.”

“Stop associating with gays and hippies.”

“Gays and Hippies are all my constituency, you will be terminated.”

“Sissy liberals can’t kill anyone.”

“I have over 500 on-screen confirmed kills, I make people bleed everywhere, you make people bleed out of their ears, I will swing my mighty tree trunk and kill you, while hiding behind this bulletproof shrub.”

“Where’s Reagen??? He’d know how to solve this. If Roland Reagan were President today, there would be no AIDS, no cancer, no war, no poverty, no grief, no sadness, no designated hitter, no feminists, no hate, no inflation, no unemployment, no tears, no Lindsay Lohan, no dropped cell phone calls, Michael Jackson would never have touched a boy, Iran would lay down their weapons, Hillary Clinton would never have left the kitchen, and he would’ve straightened out his sissy son.”

“Are you John Connor?”

“What? No. I’m Rush Limbaugh.”

“You are John Connor. My primary objective is the termination of John Connor. Resistance is futile, you will be terminated.”

BANG!

Okay so maybe I’m hoping for a lot, but a boy can dream and this is California remember, a land where the only thing more important than the size of your ego, is the size of your diamonds.

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6 Comments

Filed under News, Politics

6 responses to “when same-party politicians bicker, we all win

  1. Sometimes I think you do drugs.

  2. you

    why? you dont think this could be funny? honestly?

  3. I loved it. Just I think you do drugs doesn’t mean I don’t love it. It is hilarious and I love it and I love you, but I think you occasionally get slipped drugs.

  4. you

    well that may be, i never did keep a close eye on my drinks.

  5. Jenne

    I’m glad you’re having fun but you strike me as both repulsive and ill informed. I’ve lived in California most of my life and the ideas you have of it are based on sole stereotypes. Come visit and then you can give your shallow opinions. As for the debate between Rush and Arnold I don’t defend either of them, God knows we have problems but nobody’s perfect.

  6. TC

    No reason to get upset–we’re not trying to inform anyone here. This is just poking a bit of fun at those stereotypes you so despise.

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